lilithisbitter | Jun. 23rd, 2009

Imagine we all go to a State-Run Steak House. We pay a buttload of money and depending on where we are from, some of us have to pay a buttload of money more than others. For some reason, a few of us are forced to sit at really crappy tables which adds to money to our bill. This is worth it for the steak we are told.

So, we can enjoy our steak now, right? Hold on now. First you have to buy several cookbooks that if you bought them at a normal bookstore you could get for under 20 bucks. But because the special cheifs that will be teaching you wrote these steak cooking manuals, you have to pay 200 bucks per book. There's a new edition out this year, even though the last cook book edition had only been out for about 10 months. They've changing nothing except the order of words and this page here was modified here slightly, but really no real difference. Also included is software you'll never use and a code for an online website you'll never go on.

Now you need to sign up to learn to make your steak. The classes are overpacked and heaven forbid if you're a left-handed person wishing to cook a steak. Most lecture halls for steak cooking are 90 percent right handed half desks if you're lucky. Some don't even have left handed seats at all. And those that do... well move to the back of the class or in the aisles, because you're just 10% of the population, so therefore you must be 10% of the class always. Isn't assumption fun?

You attend your overly expensive class, where the teacher drones on and on about making a steak. That's it. There's no hands on steak making. Remember those days from your childhood? Well say bye-bye, because they're gone. People drop out of the steak house and depending on when they dropped out, they may or may not get their money back... or maybe some of it or not all of it. But since they are told to be successful in the world, you need to make a steak, they'll be back next time... they'll be shelling out more money.

At the end of lessons, you all make your steaks. You're not really sure you're doing this right at all, since maybe the book wasn't too good on this or you had a bad teacher. Your teacher grabs your steak from you and eats it. Yeah, it's that sort of steak house. They grimace because it's burned on one side and raw and bloody on the other. You fail, do over. It's not the steak house's fault, it's your fault, because you didn't try hard enough.

In other words, Colleges are like steak houses where they expect you to cook your own steak based off a boring lecture they give you (assuming that every single person that walks through their door learns exactly the same way) and still pay them huge fees for it, but there's no real guarantee you'll get something out of it. If a college truly was a business, you'd pay them and know what you're going to get. Paying for the right to learn is one of the biggest rip offs in history.

Thank you.

Code: Send in the Brainbots

comment_fic written today.

College: An Allegory

Writer's Block: When I Was Young

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